Catching a Man in a Lie

Let's be real, dude's can't fucking lie. They get caught up something serious. ALL THE FUCKING TIME! Guys are careless, they leave their skeletons all out on the open. And when shit finally hits the fan they're like "I wanted you to see that". BITCH.BOO.BYE x 10. Muthafucka you got caught. Don't even play yourself. Do you know how many times I've gotten away with a few white lies!? That's because I am smart. I think before I speak! Most girls have different approaches to catching their man in a lie. We won't tell our secrets, but I'll elaborate on the situations that most women visit from time to time...

1. "The Stutter"- I can tell you lying cause when you're replying you stutta stutta. When a dude gets his words on jumbled up that means he is LYING! He is trying to get back on track with his story. If you know what happened, you are well aware of the story, then there should be no room left for confusion. Tell me the story. Don't stop, don't think. I don't want to hear ummms, or long pauses. Fuck it, you're lying. You're buying yourself time to think.

2. "The Finger Pointer"- When a guy gets caught in a lie, he usually tries to throw the guilt onto someone else. That someone-- YOU! A dude will bring up something that happened 2 years ago just to get some of the negative attention off of himself. Dude like seriously, you are bringing up stale shit. Let's focus on what you're doing wrong. Stop trying to find something to yell at me about.

3. "The Screamer"- There comes a time when a dude loses all hope in an argument sprung up from a lie. In that case he resorts to the final tool in the chest, he screams at you. He will yell about trust, honesty, love, commitment. You name it, he will yell at you about it.

4. " The Defensive Player"- We have ALL been in this situation. And if you tell me any different then you are simply a LIAR. You call your booski, ASK him about the situation and he automatically gets defensive. You aren't accusing him of anything. You are simply asking him about the situation. He blows up on you and starts getting all defensive which shows that muthafucka is GUILTY!!!!!

5. "The Quiet Liar"- When you don't want to get yourself into trouble you just shut up so you won't say anything that can be taken the wrong way. The quiet liar usually sits back and throws out mhmmm's and yea's in hope that you would leave it alone. La don't play that shit. If I'm calling you out on your lie then best believe you are going to fucking answer me. That is NOT an option.

So we've seen them all and if you're like me then you have experienced most of them first hand. So don't be a caca head guys. Stop FUCKIN lying. Thankkss!!!