Me Vs. World

Every morning when I wake up, I count my blessings. I'm not a crazy religious person, but I am grateful for the things I have in my life. And then there are the mornings where I feel as if the world is caving in on me. Those days, much like the one I'm having today, makes me feel like I'm nothing. I am the most giving person I know. I never turn a selfish shoulder on a soul. Sometimes I'm more giving then I really need to be. So why, on days like this, do I feel neglected? Let's see, the people who "supposedly" mean the most to me, the ones I help in times of need, the ones who call me when their down and need a pick-me-up..yeah, all of those people..Where have they been for the past two days when I've been feeling down? Who the fuck knows! But I can guarantee you when they need money, or they need advice....all of a sudden I will become existant again. I've said this before, and I will say it again, I NEED to get away. People have gotten entirely too comfortable with me being here. They can always run to me when they feel their back is against the wall. But who the fuck can I run to??? Voicemails and ignored text messages? I don't care what anyone says..I am, and will forever me all alone in this world. It's ME. No one else is going to take care of me but me. Fuck trying to live to make everyone else like me. From here on out, I swear on everything I love, you guys have created a monster. You thought I was a bitch before, you have no idea of the emotions that are bottled up inside of me. NO ONE is here to listen. NO ONE!!! It's me, myself and I. I'm 21 years old. It's unfortunate that I have to find out that no one gives a fuck at such a young age. Oh well, better now then never.