I'm Worried..::insert sad face::

Lately, I've been stressing. I mean, not crazy stressing like OMG, I'm gonna die stressing. But simply, I'm really scared stressing. You get me?? Ok, let me explain. School is starting in TWO weeks and I have procrastinated to the umph degree. I have YET to fill out my financial aid (which was due in January), haven't filled out my TAP or student loan. WHAT THE FUCK AM I WAITING FOR?? I have NO clue. I think that is a sure sign of telling me..I don't wanna go back :(. They warned me that this was gonna happen. That once I got a taste of the sweet, sweet success of a full time job I wouldn't want to go back to school. But, I will be going back. No worries. It may take me a little longer to graduate since I will be working during the day, but I like it better this way. This job has WAY too many perks and I get paid WAY to good to just give this job up. So fuck it, I'm keeping it. Too be honest, I don't even know how much I get paid by the hour. When I see the check and the amount of money I'm getting...the only thing I'm worried about is getting off of work and heading over to Bloomy's.

Anyways, beside the whole school thing..I have this stressful situation with my boyfriend being away until Thanksgiving (even tho he's home this weekend) and that freaking sucks because there are times when I'm down and the only person to bring me back up is him. Seriously, I can be crying my eyes out (mostly because of him) and here he comes stopping the tears from falling. And it really sucks, because I have this other dude who thinks he's coming to steal me away on a white stallion and in all actuality...I DON'T WANT HIS ASS. So here's my other dilemma. How the hell do I tell someone that I have NO interest in them. It's cool laughing and joking and being friends. But after that...Like dude, leave me alone. Even if I were single and desperately (and I do mean desperately) looking, you STILL wouldn't be a choice of mine. And I'm the type of person who can't say no...who hates to be mean to people. We have a work related relationship. If and when I tell him, there's no interest like that..he STILL has to come in here and deliver packages. Talk about an awkward moment.

So those are just a few stressers I have under my belt. I'm sure there will be several in the months, days and years to come. Until then...yea..until then.